How to Deal with Negative Emotions

How to Deal with Negative Emotions

Everyone gets negative thoughts and emotions. But we were never taught how to deal with them. If you ever feel guilt, regret, sad, fearful, or disappointed, this tool is for you.

In the episode with Dr. David Spiegel, they talked about the mind-body connection and how to understand emotional pain.

See it like a physical injury. After you injure your knee or ankle, should you never walk again? No, you feel the pain, you face it, and that helps you heal.

And can you heal without some ice, stretching, etc.? No, you should probs take control and negotiate with the pain.

The worst thing you can do is ignore it. If you ignore it, it's like putting weight on your injured ankle, and it gets worse.

So there is a way to treat emotional pain in real time (without instantly calling a therapist). Here's what Dr. David said

If you think of an interpersonal problem or a threat of something coming as an opportunity to do something to improve the situation. So, it's not just it's happening to you, but something that you can influence and do something about. It's blending the receptive with the active response.

When you feel the situation happened or is happening to you, it's hard to overcome. You need to have a sense of control. Maybe just start with the belief that you can get out of this pain / situation.

So, when you're stuck, sad, angry, or remember a bad event, 1) it's okay and 2) think about how you can use this as an opportunity to change, think of ways you can rehabilitate.

For example: after thinking: "I'm feeling lonely...". I can say "hmm, what can I do to get out of this pain?". Maybe just reaching out to a friend.

It sounds small but it makes a huge difference. You're no longer attacked by the feeling. You go from being hopeless to a state of actively working on changing the situation. And, hence, you feel better in the short and long-term.

This is from this part of podcast #60 with Dr. David Spiegel.

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